Monthly Archives: September 2010

We are paying Minister Nahhas' family trip

Lebanon is participating in the International Telecommunication Union Plenipotentiary Conference in Guadelajara, Mexico next month and our dear telecommunications minister is taking his whole family for the trip, of course on the government’s expenses.

According to Oussama, and after he checked out the list of participants (see picture above) and investigated their relationship with minister Nahhas, it turns out he is taking his wife and two daughters along for the trip.

If this were a European president or parliament member, he would have resigned by now and apologized if not sued and jailed as well.

Captain Bob

Anyone remembers Captain Bob’s show on Tele Liban? I was very young at the time but i do recall enjoying it.

Captain Bob (Ibrahim Meraachli) died almost 6 years ago. I am sure Tele Liban still broadcasts his show from time to time as they have nothing else to show.

Lebanon is nowhere to be seen!

Lebanon did not feature in the top 100 countries of the list prepared by newsweek.

It is quite surprising to see most Arab countries featured in the top 100, knowing that education-wise for example, we have the best universities in the area and a very high literacy rate and health-wise, we have the best doctors and hospitals in the region. I checked how they ranked the countries and it looked decent but the outcome is unconvincing.

Kuwait turned out to be the best Arab country in the world.

So i moved closer and slapped her …

I was out yesterday at Kayan with a friend i haven’t seen in a long while. She had never been to Kayan so i thought i take her there as it’s my favourite pub in Gemmayze by far. The atmosphere is great and the food is just awesome! My favourite is the Salami sandwich and Chahe agrees on that.

Nevertheless, while having drinks, a girl on the nearby table takes a carrot out of our table. Not sure if she was drunk or anything, but it was funny. We just smiled and let go. While ordering the bill, the same girl comes with the bill and two shots on the house. I asked the waiter who’s buying us the shots, he answered that it is the bartender but the girl is a good friend of the owner or something, so she felt free handing us the bill and two tiramisu shots. Weird but fine with me.

I told my friend here that it’s obvious that she’s hitting on either one of us, and it seemed logical that it would be me, not that i am so hot and sexy, but what are the odds of a girl hitting on another girl?

So what to do? We just asked the girl to come join us and asked her if she were to get us shots, who would she send them for? Surprise Surprise! She picked my female friend over me lol ! (Nba3asna)

So i moved closer to the carrot girl and slapped her and told her to get the hell out of my face and she started crying. 2ou3a tsad2o! just kidding! we just paid and left.

How Wasta works …

We have to give some credit to the ISF for the way they handle wastas in some places. I luckily had the chance to witness one of their many techniques at the ISF building in Furn el Chebbak where you get your juridical report (“Sejel 3adle”) and i made a small sketch to show you how it’s done.

As you can see below, the main entrance is a door behind the building, very similar to a prison door. You get it and move between concrete, then reach a large rooms with 4 lanes. On the main door of that room, there’s a “No Entry” sign and a closed door guarded by an officer. If you happen to have a wasta, the officer lets you in and you go into the “wasta red line” i drew below and be done in few seconds time.

Now what if you protest?

- You get kicked out of the line.
- You get kicked out of the building.
- You get arrested (if you resist) and thrown in the nearby jail under the Adlieh bridge.

Watch out!

I thought i share this story with you in case any of you (god forbid) finds himself in a similar situation.

My friend’s cousin was going back from Gemmayze to Dekwaneh last week around 1 am and he was driving on the Dekwaneh-Achrafieh fast highway when a rock fell on the front of his car. He quickly stopped the car and went down to check out the damages when four guys attacked him and stole his money, not the car though. He fainted for few minutes and had to call himself the ambulance as no one would stop to rescue him. He was hospitalized and hasn’t come out yet.

One would expect less crimes to occur with Ziad Baroud in charge, but criminals are getting creative and there is not much you can do about it except put a police patrol on every road.

While googling car theft in Lebanon, i found this: Grand Theft Auto Beirut

Surprise? What Surprise?

Minister of agriculture Hussein Hajj Hassan proudly announced today that he will conduct several “surprise” visits to milk companies in Lebanon to make sure they are abiding by international standards.

A question to you Mr.Hassan:
Where is the element of surprise if you inform them in advance?

Talk of the toilet

I often come across women coming out or in the restrooms in pairs or even groups at the workplace. I never understood this phenomenem but it is apparently everywhere. Indeed, “The new door-less toilets in western India were built in a semicircle instead of in a row. The walls between cubicles were raised only halfway so that women could see and talk to each other.” [Source]

However, what amazes me is that most of them complain all the time about the toilet hygiene and the constant smells.

Why the hell do you hold your chats in the toilets if they smell?

Esther Zuckerman from the Observer argues that the bathroom is still a place to tell secrets for women.

PS: I think the title would be an interesting name for a new show, something like the view but in a restroom.

Ukrainian Plane Makes Emergency Landing in Beirut after Engine Catches Fire

A Ukrainian passenger plane with 98 people on board made an emergency landing in Beirut after one of its engines caught fire, An Nahar newspaper reported Wednesday. One of them entered the cockpit only to find a hostess fainting and the captain of the DC-9 type plane in confusion asking the control tower for a green light for an emergency landing.

According to the newspaper, Public Works and Transportation Minister Ghazi Aridi had warned the company operating the 42-year-old plane not to use it anymore. [Source]

According to the Daily star, “the plane had to return to Beirut after a “big” bird hit one of the plane’s fan blades.”

Chahe, da22et ttammanet?