via Trella

Haha!

[YouTube]

Ktir Gharibi Indeed!

Picture taken from GlobalPost

I laughed when I read that Abou Bilal the young man who approached her first is studying medicine at the Kyiv Medical University. I wonder what he will specialize in later on? Gynecology maybe?

Tatyana was a single mom working as a waitress, struggling to raise her two year-old son after her boyfriend left when he was born. One day, a young man approached her in a bar, and asked if she’d like to make good money in a “safe and quick” way. The young man was Lebanese and studying medicine at the Kyiv Medical University. He told Tatyana that he could get her a six-month visa to work as a dancer in Lebanon. His uncle, he said, owned a cabaret there, and he was looking for new dancers for the nightly show. Tatyana accepted. Soon though, it became evident to her that she was being recruited for prostitution. “I didn’t mind. I was sleeping all the time with Ukrainian jerks that disappeared as soon as they had their way with me. So why not make some cash out of it?” Her contact in Lebanon was a man called Abu Bilal. Once she arrived to Lebanon, she only met him once. “He seemed nice and caring, he warned us about never sleeping with men without condoms and stuff like that.”

You can buy Tatyana for $400 USD a night. Don’t be offended by the word ‘buy’ – she uses it herself, in a very down-to-earth manner. “I am lucky to be worth $400 in such a competitive environment. Many of the other girls are bought for $200 or even less,” she says with a hint of… is it pride?! Yes, pride indeed. Tatyana, just like her friends Olga and Yulia, is from Ukraine. She entered Lebanon four months ago with an artist visa, an inventive scheme that the Lebanese authorities use to avoid admitting that they allow prostitution. General Security closely monitors the ‘artists.’ Their residency permits do not exceed six months, and they are deported if they are caught overstaying their permits.

You can read the full article [Here].

[High-Res]

Once you are done explaining the above equation, I would appreciate if you could help me understand the new hybrid electoral law proposed.

The good thing is that we are done with this archaic hazardous Orthodox Law and The Onion won’t be suing us after all.

(Photo courtesy of Joumana Haddad)

I always enjoy reading Joumana Haddad‘s articles. This one’s hilarious yet so true.

Lebanese people do not queue. This aversion to waiting patiently for their turn in anything, at any given time and place, is so common, so “natural” and innate, that you’d think it’s written somewhere in their genes: The Swedish are blond. The Chinese have slanted eyes. And the Lebanese don’t, won’t, can’t queue. It is a (para)scientific fact.

Every single day, I experience first-hand encounters with this phenomenon. Take yesterday for example. I was waiting in line for my turn at a payment desk in one of Beirut’s malls, and a guy suddenly appeared from nowhere, and headed directly to the cashier, completely ignoring my presence and that of three other women in front of me. Maybe we were invisible, because the stud didn’t even look our way. What’s worse is that the three ladies standing ahead in line were going to let him get away with it. But I wasn’t. I couldn’t. I wouldn’t: That’s the kind of things that are written in my genes. As soon as he stretched out his hand with the bill and credit card, I stepped forward and asked him to wait in line like the rest of us. He gave me one of those “you talkin’ to me?” looks, so I gave him the “you’re an asshole” look. When the cashier agreed with me, the de Niro aficionado had to surrender and go to the end of the line mumbling something about “crazy people.” What can I say? Guilty as charged.

Also yesterday, another similar scene in the evening at a hip restaurant in downtown Beirut. A guy (again) walks in, apparently without a reservation. When the hostess told him there is a half an hour wait for a table, his nerves (already pressured by his dire need to impress the 30-years-younger-than-him woman hanging at his arm) couldn’t handle it. He started screaming at the employee, and insulting the management of the place. “You don’t know who I am” seemed to be his favorite catchphrase, since he repeated it more than a dozen times before storming out. And yet no, the hostess didn’t know “who he was,” neither did the rest of us dining there.

Read the full article [Here].

Picture from the PanArabia Enquirer

Before any of you starts commenting, this article was written by The Pan-Arabia Enquirer, the finest SATIRE from the Middle East, so it’s a totally made up story but I thought I mention it because the comments are hilarious and even funnier than the article itself!

DUBAI: Emirates has announced that it plans to trial new shisha lounges aboard its A380 fleet. In a statement released this morning, the Dubai-based airline revealed that the lounges would be available to business and first class passengers on several of its long-haul routes flown using Airbus’ superjumbo, starting from next month.
“Alongside unique offerings such as our Signature Spa and Onboard Lounges, with our new Signature Shisha Rooms premium customers will be now be able to relax amid luxurious surroundings with a traditional waterpipe,” the airline said in a press release.

“This new service will provide our Middle Eastern passengers with the sort of home comforts they’ve come to expect on our award-winning airline, while presenting those flying to the Middle East for the first time with the opportunity to sample one of the true tastes of Arabia before they’ve even landed.”

According to the statement, passengers will be able to pre-order a shisha from the onboard menu while at their seat and retire to the lounge after the main meal. [Link]

Here are some funny comments:

This one is epic!

The Pan-Arabia Enquirer website also went down yesterday for a couple of hours due to this article.

Jokes aside, I am sure Lebanese would have loved to have a Shisha service onboard.

Speaking of funny articles, here’s another story that I am still finding hard to believe: A Saudi student living in Michigan was arrested yesterday by the FBI after neighbors saw him with a pressure cooker. As it turns out, he was cooking a traditional Saudi dish, the Kabsah. [Huff]

He’s very serious about his parking space

I found at least 10 of those “Only Player – No Parking” signs in front of a commercial center in Jounieh. I didn’t know a hair salon needed that many parking lots.

Spotted in Zouk Mikhael on the road parallel to the maritime road.

Update: Lebanese Elias Bou Saab, VP of the American University of Dubai, is apparently the reason why the ceremony is always broadcasted on Lebanese TVs. He is a major shareholder in OTV and business deals with major Lebanese TVs and institutions. I was told he’s also he was the mayor of Dhour el Choueir, whose municipality is becoming a model for others to follow. He’s also the husband of singer Julia Boutros. Thanks @ArzLeb

I was told that this is not the first year that they broadcast it live but I still find it weird. They have pretty cool commencement speakers though, Arianna Huffington the Chair, President, and Editor-In-Chief Of The Huffington Post Media Group and Los Angeles’ mayor Antonio R. Villaraigosa.

I remember Journalist Ghassan Tueni (May he R.I.P) was the speaker during my AUB graduation. We didn’t get any TV coverage though, unless my memory has failed me.

Picture taken from Beirut.com

Picture by Marwa at Eat Amore cafe in Verdun

They charged them for the Nescafe as well as the mugs lol!

Thanks Sam!

An Interactive Play Exploring The Theme of “Freedom of Speech & Censorship in Lebanon

He didn’t even bother remove the original plate. Bassita chou we2fit 3le?

Thanks Manal!

[High-Res] It looks more like a Lada Niva than a FIAT

Only one model was produced in the whole world and it’s in Lebanon. Jokes aside, the Fiat Punto Abarth and 500 Abarth are awesome cars.