Category Archives: Humor

“Beirutis List” Apparently Got The Wrong Lighthouse in Their Logo

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lol

Update: Comparative picture done by Lina Ghaibeh.

The picture above has gone viral yesterday and shows the lighthouse in the Beirutis List logo versus the authentic lighthouse in Manara. I can’t confirm if Beirut-Madinati is behind it (couldn’t find it on their page) but I looked up old pictures of Beirut’s famous lighthouse, which dates back to the 1800s, and it’s very different from the one in the logo indeed. Even the new one that was built in late 90s doesn’t resemble the one shown in the Beirutis List. Assuming the curved stripes are meant to show a tie, the upper shape of the lighthouse has nothing to do with the two lighthouses we have in Beirut.

l1

I know that this is a minor detail and the slogan in the “Beirutis List” is the real problem for me to be honest, but still it’s funny how no one paid attention to this detail, especially if their whole campaign is about giving Beirut back to the Beirutis (whatever that means). If there’s something I’m missing here, please do share but this is the only lighthouse I know about.

5 Manara, 1960

Gilberte Zouein Myth Busted

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zouein via Lebanonfiles

Gilberte Zouein apparently likes to talk a lot when she’s out with her friends. It seems politics is not really her thing so she’d rather not get involved, even though she’s an elected Member of Parliament (makes sense?).

I think it’s quite pathetic that MPs are still getting paid even though they renewed their terms twice illegally and unconstitutionally and aren’t really doing anything for the country. From 2008 till 2014, Lebanese have paid in tax money their MPs over 400 billion Lebanese Liras ($266 Million Dollars).

In any functional democracy, MPs should have resigned by now and early elections would have taken place. Let’s hope municipal elections this year will pave the way for more accountability and transparency.

Twelve Things You Always Hear in a Lebanese Basketball Game

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bball

If a team loses, they blame the referee.
If a team wins, the other team’s fans attack them.
If the fans are banned from watching, the players get into a fight.
If the teams don’t like some new rule, they blame the federation.

The sad part is that some referees are terrible and should be fired and the federation is almost as incompetent as all the previous ones. And let’s not forget the 3-foreign players rule which killed the game and turned it into a 3 on 3 between every team’s foreign players. (Sometimes it’s even a 1 on 1).

Joke of the Day: Lebanon to Sign Climate-Change Pact in New York

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2arrib Source

Dear Prime Minister, wake up, get out and smell the garbage in Beirut.

Prime Minister Tammam Salam traveled to New York on Thursday to participate in the ceremony aimed at signing the climate-change pact that the world adopted in principle in Paris last December.

The state-run National News Agency said Salam is expected to give a speech at Friday’s ceremony, which will be attended by leaders and envoys from more than 160 countries. [Naharnet]

Why Would Anyone Buy A Special Passport Number?

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passport

The Lebanese passport is one of the most expensive and least useful in the world, yet for some reason, the General Security has just released special “VIP” passport numbers that will cost you up to LL 1,000,000.

I can understand golden mobile numbers and up to a certain extent car plate numbers but why would I pay extra to get a special passport number? Will that special number allow me to enter more countries without a visa? Do I get free upgrades at hotels or during a flight if I show off my number? Will I get a free “Arabic Select Upgrade” on Southwest Airlines?

There’s only one type of Lebanese who will benefit from that: Those who show off every time they check in at the MEA Cedar Lounge will now be able to brag about their “special” passport numbers.

Here are few funny tips from Farix on how to make use of that special number:

Road Works 3al Lebnené

Posted By :

werach via LBCILebanon

Half the country got stuck in traffic from Antelias till Maameltein because of the road works next to the Casino du Liban. I cancelled my son’s appointment at KMC because I was told I’d never make it there on time and I’m staying in Beirut till 7:30 to avoid traffic.

The best part is that the cops had to help out the workers to fix (ter2ee3) the road and clear the way for cars. I’m glad they did but they should go fine the contractor for this lousy work.

Update: The contractor apparently got arrested according to the Ministry of Public Works but that’s not enough.

ISF2 via ISF

PS: The works are scheduled to start at 10 PM so I’m not sure what they were doing during the day.