In case you’ve been wondering how our national debt got so big, here’s your answer. To make things worse, we’ve become so corrupt that no one cares about completing any project now, they just want to steal the money and accuse others of corruption, or even better, state that they are leading a battle against corruption.
Everyone is tagging MTV on this ad but I can’t seem to find it anywhere on their website. It is a hilarious and spot-on ad. The video ends with ” بربكن صلحوا الطرقات الزفت” in an attempt to shed the light on road conditions in Lebanon but I can’t find the full version yet.
If you’re having trouble dealing with the garbage situation in Lebanon, follow the below guidelines:
1- Keep a picture of our current Environment Minister with you at all time. It’s a very efficient blocking tool.
2- Make use of all these mosquitoes to create new local dishes. Mosquito Hrisse can be our new local secret on Snapchat. Chou we2fit 3al Fattet Shrimps?
3- If you can’t stand the smell and have to take out your garbage, throw if off the balcony.
4- If you risk getting caught, build a small catapult, install it on the roof and throw your garbage to your neighbor’s roof.
5- Urinate to mark your “garbage” territory so that no one else throws trash in your spot.
6- Keep a picture of a fried rat and show it to any rat you spot on the street. That way, he will get scared and stay away from you. (Make sure to look him in the eye).
7- Snapping at a party by rotating your camera stupidly and making your followers dizzy can be made much easier with mosquitoes around.
8- Buy a net mask and wear it at all time to avoid swallowing mosquitoes. If you can’t afford masks, try to negotiate with the mosquitoes and ask them kindly not to enter your mouth, or bribe them with a couple of blood drops.
9- There’s no need to feel guilty if you fart during a date or in public, just blame it on the garbage piles and fart at will.
10- The new waves of mosquitoes arriving are harmless and are part of the celebrations prepared by the government to mark the 100th anniversary of the invasion of locusts (jarad) during WWI. If you spot suited up mosquitoes, don’t be afraid.
9gag has dropped Lebanese comedian, musician, actor, dubbed “Malik el Sex wel Cornflex wel Tipex” Anthony Hamawi as its overly confident man after leaked images from his wedding revealed him in a not so confident position. A close friend of his was quoted saying “7ala2oulou lal m3attar”.
In other shocking news, Hamawi has promised to clean the house from time to time, do the dishes and even prepare meals. He even vowed to shop for 2 hours every week with his wife and carry her bag if needed.
Mabrouk Anthony & Cynthia, wish you all the best!
PS: That’s the best & most courageous decision you’ll ever take in your life #2uw2.
The above table was being shared yesterday as an April Fools’ joke. I have no idea whether it’s all fabricated or inspired from the 2020 plan announced by the MOT, but what’s sure is that we are still far from getting these speeds.
Few days ago, I asked people to share speedtest screenshots on Facebook and some of the speeds I got were deplorable. We are talking about 0.13, 0.47 and 0.12Mbps download DSL speeds here. The majority had speeds below 2Mbps while the highest speed I got was 4.69Mbps from a local cable provider in Achrafieh.
I’m glad that the internet topic is all over the news recently and as I stated previously, slow internet is as important as the garbage problem, whether you like to admit it or not, because technology has a huge impact on every country’s development and falling behind will cost us dearly in the future.
I got an email yesterday from a Lebanese University student asking me for a recommendation letter. I thought at first the letter was for my brother since it said “Dear Dr” and he’s a doctor but it was actually addressed to me.
I replied and asked the student where he got my email from and he told me the secretary at the university gave him this address thinking that it was his professor’s email. Of course I informed him that the email is wrong but then I looked through my junk mail and found tons of emails (some of them seemed confidential) being sent to my address from the LU. I also got a happy birthday email back in September with the professor’s name written in the subject.
I am going to email them in a bit and ask them to correct all this mess but I have 3 questions here:
– Where did they get my email from? And how come no one noticed there’s a wrong email in that long list?
– Why are all the emails listed in the TO: field and not hidden in BCC: as they should be?
– Why isn’t there an online directory for students to look up their teachers’ emails? And how do they communicate usually?