Category Archives: Humor

Why ISIS Are Not Coming To Beirut Anytime Soon

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isisinlebnow Photoshopped Picture of an ISIS Tank stuck in traffic

Forget all the conspiracy theories and geopolitical and intelligence reports, ISIS will never get to Beirut because of the traffic. Read the whole article [Here].

“ISIS has repeatedly attempted to blitz Beirut in recent months,” al-Fashal explained, somewhat apologetically, during a phone call on his way to our scheduled interview in downtown Beirut. “However, our entry from the east proved difficult: our commanders deemed Dahr al-Baydar too dangerous, as it is littered with reckless van drivers and scooter heroes… Bottom line: we’ll fucking detonate ourselves for a good cause, but none of us wants to be taken out by the Hawa Chicken deliveryman. After initial progress down the Dhour-Choueir road, we ran into an inconsiderate convoy of camionet (trucks)—probably delivering arms to Hezbollah, by the way. Assholes.” [NowLebanon]

Lebanese Driver To Revolutionize Moto GP Racing With New Fish Position

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fish Picture via Yasa

Moto GP teams are showing interest in a new aerodynamic position nicknamed the “fish position” that was discovered by a scooter driver in Lebanon while he was pulling stunts on the highways. The driver was interviewed by our website who said that he was surprised to find his picture on so many websites this morning. He also revealed that he didn’t mean to come up with a new move; instead he was feeling too hot so he thought he’d take down his short and lie on the scooter to get more air.

The “fish position” has blown away aerodynamics engineers who have already started designing new bikes for their teams. Moreover, team managers have submitted an official request to the FIM (Fédération Internationale de Motocyclisme) to allow drivers to race shirtless.

Hilarious Wedding Invite

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wedding (I removed the date and the venue)

I got this picture via Whatsapp and it’s part of a wedding invite in Lebanon where guests who don’t confirm before a specific date are asked to bring a chair and drink with them. While this may seem funny, a lot of Lebanese have a problem calling and confirming if they’re coming to a wedding or not for some reason.

PS: Congrats to the newly weds!

Fadi Ma Sa2at, Akhad 2ifedé

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mem via Lebanese Memes

As you all probably know by now, Our Education Minister decided to issue passing statements for all students who applied for official exams this year in order for them to continue with their academic plans and be able to enroll in universities. The minister also offered 48 hours to find alternatives before proceeding with the passing statements once and for all.

This basically means that all students passed their exams without any corrections made, which is unacceptable in my opinion, but probably the only plausible solution given that the teachers are still on strike and are refusing to correct the exams. Speaking of which, and even though they have every right to demand raises, I think the teachers are doing a big mistake by jeopardizing the students’ interests.

I think there are two alternative solutions that could be adopted:

1- Outsource the correction to private school teachers or some specialized group.
2- Public school teachers to pause their strike, correct the exams and resume it afterwards.