It’s almost officially the end of summer and demonic devil worshipers are back. Their groups are bigger and stronger now and their parties are even wilder! Black Mass, Sacrifice rituals, recitation of prayers, digital drugs (whatever that means) and other satanic rituals are widespread again all over Lebanon and Al Jomhouriya is raising the alarm!
Having said that, and to avoid ending up at a devil worshiping party, I am re-sharing the below list and adding new points:
1- Satanist parties usually last more than one night.
2- Arguile is forbidden there.
3- Jägermeister is their preferred alcohol.
4- They don’t play Ali el Deek songs.
5- They love blood so make sure you keep a bag of blood on you and spray it on them. If they enjoy it then run for your life!
6- They dance tirelessly for hours.
7- Guys don’t dress up and girls rarely wear heels.
8- Party venues are not fancy and consist of remote places or abandoned warehouses.
9- They don’t eat.
10- Digital drugs are distributed at midnight.
11- They hate cotillion.
(New)
12- They eat Sushi with their hands.
13- They loved their mothers in law.
14- They eat their Chicken Shawarma with no garlic.
15- Their favorite movie is “The Devil Wears Prada”.
16- Male devil worshipers have no hair on their chest.
17- Their fashion idol is Laila Abdel Latif.
18- They all have black iPhones.
19- They drink Bloody Mary instead of Arak with their nayye (raw meat).
20- They have more than 3 ear piercings.
21- They use TSIF instead of TGIF in their posts.
22- At midnight when electricity goes off, they shout “Hell Yeah” instead of “7awwil 3al moteur”.
Just for the record and for the millionth time, there has NEVER been a confirmed case of satanism in Lebanon.